Story ( no enter, indent!)<--dialogue

Flags wave proudly everywhere, the exuberant people shout, "Man-sae!Hooray!", pink Rose of Sharons line the joyous dirt streets...Today is August 15,1945 and today is both a day of celebration and of sorrow for Korea because though we are finally free from the morbid control of the Japanese, we are left permanently scarred from the losses that were injustly brought upon us. After countless fights, deaths, and prayers, our country has been restored of our precious independence.I hold onto my cross necklace, remembering my father who was a victim of the brutal and savage murders. Today marks the third year since the day of his death. My father had been a pastor, a devoted and influential leader during the invasion. Like a criminal, he was executed along with 13 other committed members of our congregation for standing up for what was right-the truth.

Unlike him, I was unable to stand up for what I believed in. I was a coward. While my father had been risking his life for his beliefs, I had lied that I wasn't Korean in order simply make my life "easier."

"Bo Lam-ahh!" a familiar voice resonates amid shouts of joy. Puzzled and surprised, I turn around only to find an arm waving excitedly above many heads. It is my best friend Jung-hoon. He sprints towards me and finally reaches me, panting, with his head in between his legs and palms on his bruised knees. After a couple of reassuring deep breathes he finally begins to speak, "I'm guessing you have no idea why people are acting like lunatics and yelling ' We've won?' "

I take a moment to observe the clear sky above, the birds are tweeting happily while perching on the electric wires, watching us.

"I know... I just had some things to think about."

"Oh..." he says finally realizing what's wrong, "Sorry, I... honestly forgot."

"It's alright, I mean it's been three years already hasn't it?, I can't stay like this forever."

"But still...sorry," he responds, sincerely apologizing. After a couple seconds of staring at the ground in shame, he exclaims, "Hey, I almost forgot to tell you!"

"What?"

"Your brother's back."

In disbelief and desperation I ask, " Where? Where did you see him?"

"Earlier this morning, I stopped by your house to see if you were there, but instead of finding you I found your brother. He's probably staying for good this time though, so you don't need to worry."

This brother, this brother of mine had left 5 years ago saying "Once we make those dirty bastards crawl and beg on their bloody knees, I'll come back, I promise," acting as if he could be Empress Myeongsong and change the country. He had left as fast as the speed of light, despite my parents' strong disapproval. Since he had been 16 then, I couldn't imagine how much he had changed. I hoped from my heart that the bloody demonstrations and killings hadn't affected his well being like many of the people I had heard stories of.

"Bo Lam!"

"Yeah, what were were you going to say?" I respond, awaking from my daydream.

With a worried frown on his face, he continues excitedly, " We got our house back! Well...we're missing a couple things here and there but we still have the place...our place back!"

With genuine enthusiasm, I congratulate him, "That's great, I'm really happy for you."

"You have to be happy Bo-Lam, because things are only going to get better. This is only the beginning."

At his words I have nothing to say for there were things that just could not be changed or brought back, like historical artifacts, the royals, and the dignity and lives of many Korean people. And so I wondered, would things really get better?
***************
My brother has returned from his journey. After he was hit by a police man who was trying to "defend himself," his right eye isn't of much use anymore. He manages, but still can't stand the fact that we are going to visit my father's grave tomorrow. Three years ago, on the day of our independence, my brother had been absolutely dumb-struck and shocked at the news that he wouldn't speak for weeks. This caused neighbors and friends to ask, "Is he mute too?"

"No," I would answer them, "he's just in a state of shock, he just needs some time to think." As the pain-stackingly slow, overwhelming years passed, my brother and I have matured and have left the past...or at least have tried to. I ask my brother, who is listening intently into my dad's old radio, "So you really think that we'll be uniting this year?"

"Shh...I need to hear this," he replies while straining to hear every single detail of the static-filled news report. He finally replies, turning the radio off, "Well, we've been like this for four years already, how long do they plan to keep us like this? This isn't their country-it's ours."

True...how long did the Soviets and the Americans plan to keep the upper and lower half apart? I had heard about their plans for a stronger, better Korea. Hopefully their plans would fufill our dreams for unification.

"Bo Lam-aah! Can you go pick up the incense from Hyun-joon Ajusshi's store?" my mom yells from the kitchen.

I complain, "Mom~You just said you didn't have anything else for me to do!"

"Well, now I do, so please go do it. You can have your free time after!"

"Okay!" I shout in annoyance, sensing that she will start yelling at me if I'm not out the door in 5 minutes. Today was a busy day for both me and other Koreans across the country. Today was Chuseok-Thanksgiving,a day in which we visited our ancestral graves to pray for good harvest and the well being of family. It was also the day in which everyone wore hanboks and celebrated by eating song-pyun and playing games like Not- Ttwigi and Yun nal-gee...I would be running errands all day in order to prepare to visit my father's grave tomorrow, I would be missing out on all the fun.

In hopes of being able to stop by my all-time favorite candy store, I start running to the store to pick up the incense. "Uh-suh oh-sae-yo," a deep and friendly voice greets me as I enter the warm, ginseng-scented store.

"Ah-Ah-young-ha-sae-sae-yo," I stutter as I walk towards the counter.

"Son-neem, uh-duh-gae doh-wah duhl-eel-gah-yo?"

"Uh...nae, juh-hee umma-geh-suh...."

"It's me... Bo Lam." Bewildered, I slowly look up. He has a familiar, warm, baby-boy face, and seems to have grown a slight mustache and half a foot taller since I've last seen him..."Jung-hoon! Is that really you? You've changed a lot since I last saw you!"

"I know, it's been three years already! You've gotten prettier yourself," he exclaims in his naturally excited tone and awkwardly new deep voice.

"I seriously thought you were an ajusshi," I say laughing.

"I know, my voice is really low now," he says going up an octave for my sake. "You still seem to float into your own world whenever I see you."

"I know, my mom says that I have a problem because I keep on dreaming during the daytime ."

"Well, it's good to think to yourself sometimes." There's an awkward silence and I am reminded of my mother's mission.

"Oh, I need to get the incense that Hyun-joon ajusshi promised my mom."

"Oh yeah, sorry I almost forgot, I'll go get it," Jung hoon says as he rushes into the back of the store.

"Hey Jung-hoon I think..." I yell after him discovering a package of incense on the counter.

Seeing Jung-hoon with a new package I just stay silent. "Here," he says smiling and gives me it.

"Thanks"

"No problem, you're going to come here again right?"

"Yeah, my mom comes here all the time."

Chuckling he responds,"Alright then, see you."

"Alright," I say as I open the store door and reluctantly walk outside. I open the incense box to find a note inside. It reads "Hey, I know it was awkward, but I was purely speechless when I saw you. I hope that you keep your promise and come as often as you can. I missed you! -Your Best Friend, Jung hoon." I hear a strong thump-thump in my ear and quickly cram the note into my pocket. My heart is beating uncontrollably. Why was I so nervous? Was I starting to have feelings for him? I discard these thoughts and begin scurrying towards my house, sensing that time has passed much faster than expected.

"Where were you?" my mom asks while packing fresh fruits, a mat, four lunchboxes, a small table, and a bottle of rice wine.

"I saw Jung-hoon at the store."

"That's nice, how is he doing?"

"He's happy as usual, " I answer cautiously, afraid of spilling out my personal thoughts.

Oblivious to my answer my mom totally changes the topic, "We have to go soon, hurry up and go get changed." Disappointedly I trudge upstairs to dress into my dreaded yellow and red hanbok-two colors that I have unwillingly worn for the past two years. "Remember to bring the incense down!" my mom commands.

"Coming!" I yoddle rushing down the stairs dressed in my bright dress with the box of incense in my hands. We're out the door and in a city bus in a flash. It'll be a long ride in this stuffy, creaking bus full of impatient children, stressed out moms, and snoring dads.I hold onto a modest basket full of apples and pears and look out at other families dressed in festive hanboks playing geu-nae, dancing the kang-gangsulle, and watching sirrum. How ironic it was, that today could be both a day of laughter and mourning.I lie back in my small carpet seat and try to get some sleep or peace of mind...

Thud! I awake from my restless sleep and rub my head in pain. I gaze out the window in awe-it's really raining. How unpredictable the weather could be. We called this sonagi, a sudden fall of rain.The sky is infested with pearly gray clouds, exposing only hints of a somber dark blue sky. The bus shrieks in fury as it comes to a sudden halt, this is our stop.

My obba and umma stand up as if on cue, "Bo-Lam-ah dah-wat-dah." Following a couple other frantic passengers, I hurriedly run off the bus and to my joy, slip and fall.

"Jo-shim hae!" my mother scolds and pulls me under the shelter and dryness of the huge umbrella. We walk slowly side by side up the muddy dirt streets, past small hanoks and green pastures.

"We're here," my mom says going ahead of us. We were now standing in front of my dad's soggy, weed-infested grave site. It had never hit me that he was truly gone, until now...as I stared down at the abandoned mound which contained my lifeless father. My brother lays out the mat and places the table on it. My mom begins to set the fruits on the table, one by one, and walks towards my father's tombstone. My obba signals me to follow her. I watch her silently as she kneels down on the wet ground beside the mound.

My mom finally starts speaking,"Yu-boh, we're here... Haven't Minwoo and Bo-Lam grown so much? I'm sure you already know that we've won our independence? It's a pity that you had to go before seeing it..." she wipes her eyes with the handkerchief then the tombstone.

"It's nice up there isn't it? I was supposed to go with you, you've broken our promise..." like a deflated balloon my mom breaks down and starts sobbing uncontrollably. Not knowing what to do,my brother helps her up and orders me to stay with her. I do as I am told, and try my best to comfort her.

I love my mother, but I can't help but hate her fear. She believes that one's life is more important than one's beliefs. When my father passed away, she had called him a "fool" and a "coward" because of the rashness of his actions that had caused his death. Though I have come to understand that she said these things only out of agony, as a child I was clueless, and was convinced that my father had really been "foolish." How could I have come to look down upon someone who had loved me so much?

I watch as my obba starts to pour wine around the mound letting my father "drink" and pulls weeds out as he makes his way around the grave.

"Go help obba," my mom says suddenly, surprising me. I stand up immediately and start burning the incense.

"Why does it have to rain today?!" my brother yells in his thunderous voice, violently throwing the bottle to the ground. I jump in shock almost dropping the incense stick. I don't know if he is saying this because he's bothered by the fact that it's raining or because he's mad at himself for tearing up in front of his little sister. I remember when my dad would always scold my brother saying, " Nam-jah nun ooh-nun-guh ah-neeh-yah," and later buy us candy because he felt bad.I felt guilty for having complained about coming here and I felt sorry for my dad who would have to stay here in the rain by himself once we were gone. We take turns burning the incense in the pouring rain and finally begin eating,though of course none of us really eat. Instead, we watch as my father accepts his food,and silently weep within ourselves.
****************
"Obba! We're going to be late!" I yell at my brother who has probably gone back to sleep after his countless responses of, "Okay, I'm coming." Today was Seolnal,or in other words new years, and we were to go visit my mother's parents who lived about a city away. It had been five years since the day of our independence and this was the first year we were going to be able to celebrate Seolnal full blast. Though their home wasn't far away, my brother would have to take me to their house because my mother had already been there since last month because my hal-ah-buh-jee had been very ill. We were going to meet her along with our relatives there and I didn't want to be late. "Obba!!!!!!!!!!"I cry out loud, "I'm going to leave without you!" I make sounds as if I am going out the door and sure enough my brother is sluggishly coming down the stairs with his sleepy eyes and messy hair.

Rubbing his eyes he says, "Wait, I need time to change." My brother, Minwoo, who is obviously not 26, was turning 26 this year and was still over-protective of me who was turning 20 this year. Though he had turned into my temporary guardian, I felt like I was the one who truly had the control. I pack the ddeok, rice cake, in preparation of the exciting new years ceremony that is awaiting us.

We board bus again, just like we did a year ago when we were visiting our father's grave. It would be seven months till we would see him again...

The bus is packed as usual, but it would be easier to handle this time because it would only be an hour drive. I turn around stretching but quickly put my hands down, remembering that I was wearing a hanbok-a "beautiful" yet armpit-exposing dress that my mom forced me to wear. I dreaded everything that I was wearing except for the cross necklace which hung over my chest.It was the only thing that I was proud to call my own. "We're here," my obba says though I already know. I can see two small silhouettes and a slightly larger silhouette from outside the stained window, and I recognize who they are right away. They're my grandparents and my mother.

I waddle down and out the bus yelling, "Hal-muh-nee, Halahbuhjee, Umma!" and am embraced by my grandma's warm body.

My brother has a hard time keeping up as we walk up the path to my grandparents' house. We are greeted by my aunts, uncles, and cousins who are playing yut-no-lee on the ondol floor.

"Hey, you guys came!" my youngest niece, So-Lah, exclaims as she hugs my legs.

"Aren't you going to go sirrum with the guys Minwoo?," my young uncle asks my brother.

Before my brother can answer he continues chuckling, "You're too old for it? Oh, come on, are you afraid to lose?" Being the pushover he is, my brother follows my uncle outside.

"Unnie, do you want to go nol-twee-gi?" So-Lah asks.

"Sure," I respond in adoration.

The rest of the day is spent in play until we are called in by the elders to come and perform sebae. Everyone takes turns bowing except for my grandparents, who are the eldest. My uncles, aunts, and mother bow before my grandparents and we children bow in front of all the elders and recite, "Sae-hae bok man-hee badt-uh sae-yo," in our fancy outfits. Happily tucking our money away into our joo-muhn-ees, we frolick outside to continue playing. Only after a couple minutes on the geu-nae with So Lah, I am pulled aside by my grandmother who signals me to follow her. We end up in a quiet and lush field with many small gardens and hyang-ah-lees filled with fermented foods lined against the short fences. "It's been hard for your mother hasn't it?" she finally asks while adjusting a stick that once supported a zuchinni plant.

"Yes," I say, only to regret being so blunt.

"I can see it in your mother's eyes. She's gotten quite a few wrinkles and looks to have aged since I last saw her." Sighing she continues, "You're the only one she has...you have to listen to her, okay?"

I frown unable to comprehend, my mother also had my brother.

As if sensing my confusion my grandmother adds, "I know your brother is trying his best to take your father's place, but who your mom really needs right now is you...you never know when your brother will decide to leave again."

"Bo-Lam-ahh!" my mom calls from afar, "I need you to help me."

In relief I hug my grandma saying, "Okay," and run down the rock path back to the house, glad to have escaped before saying anything I would have regret.

"Where are you going?" asks my niece skipping towards me with her eyes wide.

"My mom needs me," I say squeezing her cheeks. After declaring this, I come to question myself and start to worry. Would there be another reason for my brother to leave? Would he really leave? And, would I have enough strength to stay by my mother's side? No, I say to myself, this year would be a prosperous year, I mean, it had to be.

"Bo-Lam!" my brother calls.

"Okay, coming!" I yell... and then I utter to myself,"coming."

**************

Today is June 25, 1950 and I am laying on the streets of my town, Seoul, lost and afraid. I look up from the ground and watch people frantically running and screaming every where,ambulances and police cars roaring with their sirens, and gun shots and bombs resonating, shaking me to the bone. What was I doing here, laying in the middle of all this chaos? Why were the northerners attacking the southerners? Why were we having a war amongst ourselves? Where were the Americans when we needed them? There were way too many questions, but no one to answer them...This couldn't be happening...I cover my ears and start to pray, trying to block out all the blood, all the noise, all the confusion. "Dear Lord, we need you right now...I need you right now. I don't know what to do and I'm afraid. I'm afraid to stay here but my mom wants me to stay, even if it means denying my identity as a South Korean...I don't want to pretend to be something that I'm not Lord, please help me to stand up for what's right. Help me...please help me..." Tears like blood fall from my eyes as I clutch my cross.

"Bo-Lam!" a blurred voice calls from afar. "Bo-Lam" the voice grows closer. I can see Jung-hoon's face.

"You're here, I missed you," I whisper into his ear.

"I'm here, there's no need to be afraid," he says assuringly, holding me tight.

I watch as a small bird flies across the dawn sky into the radiant light of the horizon.
Just then I knew what to do...

"Jung-hoon."

"I'm here."

"I have to get out of here."

With a hesitating sigh he says, "Okay but," he hugs me closer and whispers in my ear, "I'm leaving with you."

I had to leave this place...I had to go far away, until I became like the bird, free.